Annoyance

On an average day, I receive a maximum of 5 calls (a minimum of 1) from 'unavailable' on my cell phone.  Unavailable is the American Red Cross, calling to ask me to donate blood again.  This has been ongoing for about six months now.  For awhile, I'd ignore the calls after pretending that Katie wasn't available when I answered (I didn't want to give blood).  Sorry, but I have a serious phobia of needles... the thought of it makes my stomach flip.  One time, I did even go so far as to make an appointment to give blood with the caller, but I just couldn't bring myself to go.  Of course, I was wracked with guilt the entire afternoon the day of the alleged blood-giving, but the guilt wasn't enough to get me to the blood drive.  I remember a teacher at my high school who literally had given galloons of blood, to the point that there is a plaque at our local hospital acknowledging his 'gift of life'.  Why aren't we all doing this??!  But anyway, back to my attempts to avoid (giving blood and) the persistent calls...  Finally one night a couple of months ago, Ryan intervened on my behalf.  He answered my cell phone and said that Katie didn't live here anymore.  So, for the last two months, I didn't have any unavailable calls.  Phew, I was in the clear!  I could forget all about those needles and blood bags, and go back to living in oblivion. 
Well, they've started in full force over the last two weeks... with a total of 4 yesterday.  Apparently someone didn't get the memo that I moved.  I answered on the fourth call last night, wondering if perhaps it wasn't the Red Cross and maybe it was Publisher's Clearing House announcing I'd won the millions.  It was the Red Cross.  I quickly told her that Katie wasn't available, but then the caller took a new approach: asking if I was a blood donor and would be interested in making an appointment to give.  I said I have donated in the past and then hastily said I wasn't interested and had to go.  I hung up, my heart racing, palms sweaty.... feeling guilty and anxious.  What is wrong with me?!?!  A couple of minutes with a needle jabbed in my arm to help save someone else who is in a dire situation?  Well, I've decided it's time to stop projecting my annoyance onto the Red Cross and realize I might be a little annoyed with myself... my laziness and fear.  There just so happens to be a blood drive today, right down the street from where I babysit in the afternoons.  I happened to have found my blood donor card in the recent clean out of my closets, so I will place it in my pocketbook and see what happens today :)  Wish me luck!